More Than A Month of Anxiety...and Two Days of BLISS!!!

I am not sure if I have mentioned it before, but.....I have a fear of spending money. tee hee....Okay so I have. You can go here and read my most recent levels of anxiety, and my month long struggle.

Memorial Day weekend, I found myself at the computer, staring at my shopping cart on Amazon.com. I had lots of things in that cart, and it was FULL! My anxiety level was at critical levels, and my horribly upset stomach was the proof. I sat there with my cursor hovering over the "place order now" button for what seemed like 3 days. At one point I cancelled out. Moments later I was back, and that button was calling my name. I resisted the urge to tuck my head between my knees and gasp for air. I finally hit the button. OH WAIT....I didn't hit THAT button, I hit the "apply for an Amazon.com credit card and receive $30 off this purchase" button. Now don't tell me you are surprised? tee hee

After filling out an ungodly amount of info, and promising my first born that it was factual to the best of my knowledge, I was approved. :) Now between you and me, we both know that I will not be actually using this Amazon.com credit card EVER again, but how could I resist $30 off? Seriously, that is a lot of money. I don't care if it just took my like 30 minutes off my life to sign up, it was worth it.

Anyhow,back to my shopping cart I went. Isn't it a lovely feature that they keep it all there in your cart, even if you happen to leave for a month? When you come back, it will all be sitting there in your cart waiting for you to buy it. Might be a little dusty, but it is there. How considerate of them. Maybe they know me, and are aware that I need all the help I can get to just get this purchase under my belt. Who knows? All I do know is that they surely made every effort to get me to finally click that scary little button. PLACE ORDER!!!!

I am not ashamed to admit that the instant I clicked that button, I think I vomited in my mouth a little bit. No less than 2 seconds later, I was pacing the floor and NEEDED to tell someone the crazy thing I had just done. I RAN to my Internet Baby Board, and hollered out my news. I needed everyone to tell me I did the right thing. Of course I could count on my friends. I am blessed like that. I also left like 4 long, and hardly coherent voice mails for various people in my life. For some reason everyone and there dog were out on the Holiday weekend. I forget that not everyone is a Homebody like me. Oh well, all I really needed to do was SAY the words, so the voice mails worked nicely. Each time I said those words....I felt the tiniest bit better.

It would not be an exaggeration to tell you that I was physically ill for about 3 days. I consumed Tums like they were going out of style, and I developed a nervous twitch. Okay, so maybe the twitch is an exaggeration, but I did revert to my old habit of itching my foot on the carpet. ARGH!!! However, after day three, an interesting thing happened....I started to get excited! I began to track my packages like a mad woman, and grew impatient. It was odd that as the anxiety over the purchase drifted away, it was quickly replaced with an "it can't get here soon enough" attitude.

I am proud to announce that as of LATE Wednesday afternoon, I am a thoroughly blissful owner of the Canon Digital Rebel XTi. I also purchased a 50mm 1.8 lens, and I literally in love with it. In two and a half days I have taken over 300 pictures and I am FREAKIN THRILLED!!! The anxiety is gone, the worry is gone....it is all good baby. I would love to say, that I will remember this feeling the next time I want to make a big purchase, but I know that the process just has to be followed. I can't get here, without being there. It is just how I roll. Like it or not!

I'd love to take a moment to share with you a sample of the pictures I have taken so far. I am literally two and a half months behind on editing pictures, so I am not sure when I'll get around to editing these first photos in full, but I chose out a few on my favorites, and edited them. I am not disappointed. LIFE IS GOOD!

This is the 5th picture I took literally 10 minutes after the UPS trucks dust settled.

Here are a few flower pictures I took that evening at my Parent's house.

Pansy

This Lily picture could possibly be my favorite Non-person picture I have ever taken.

This was taken this morning. Please ignore the Ketchup (she insisted on a hot dog for breakfast) on her face. Check out how sharp her eyes are. sigh...LOVE!

Here's a fun one I took later this morning that shows how fun selective focusing and depth of field can be.

I couldn't resist our Century old Barn. I need to get back there someday when I don't have a toddler to keep out of trouble.

Lastly, here is Sugar Bear on her slide this evening. Sigh....I might be starting to annoy her though. Tonight when she called me out to her play structure and I showed up with my camera, she said, "Oh NO! Not again!" tee hee

Now you have to promise that if you see these pictures again in a few months you won't groan, and say, "Oh No....NOT AGAIN!"