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Sunday, September 30, 2007

"Miss Mind Reader" and Her Sidekick "Mama Doesn't Have A Clue!"

Up until the last few weeks, I was 100% confident that not a single person in our household had any sort of super power. Well, unless you count being able to cook dinner, read the mail, play hide and seek, and feed the dog all at once a super power. I can do that, but what mom can't, right? I am talking about SUPER POWERS....turning things to ice, transforming into different objects, x-ray vision, etc. These powers, so far, have been completely and utterly lacking in our house. Then...something crazy happened....

Suddenly, as if she awoke from a spell induced sleep, Sugar Bear awoke a few weeks ago with this crazy ability to read the mind of all things. Yes....ALL THINGS! Everyone in her view, all animals in the house, all toys, objects, and imaginary friends. ALL THINGS! She reads their mind...she has intuition. She and only SHE knows exactly what each and every person or thing in this here house is about to do or say! It is annoying incredible! I kid you not. This little 2.5 year old child is all knowing...and sadly, so VERY sadly, Mama doesn't have a clue. It appears that Mama not only does NOT possess this special power, she has suddenly lost all creative control.

Each and everyday, there are constant moments when the powerful and powerless butt heads. Before this magical super power possessed Sugar Bear....all was right with the world. Sugar could request of the Great Mama to play with her, and Mama would gladly oblige. Like with many 2 year olds, imaginary play began to emerge. They'd choose a game of kitty and doggy, or they'd happily take on the roles of the king, queen, and knight that reside in the Little People Castle. Sugar would assume a character, and mama would take one as well. The fun would begin. The imaginary conversations would go back and forth. Sugar would say, "would you like to ride horses, queen?" and Mama would reply, "Sure, king...let's go!" or perhaps she would choose to say, "No thanks, I want to stay here and tame the dragon." No matter what Mama said, Sugar Bear went along with it. Life was good....and the play was fun. Mama enjoyed the opportunity to let her creativity soar.

Then, that horrible fateful morning, it all changed....and nothing hs been the same. NOTHING! Sugar Bear knows exactly what is to be said or done, and she knows all this moments in advance. Now the imaginary play goes much like this:

Scene- Sugar Bear and Mama settle themselves in front of the Little People Farm.

Sugar: (handing Mama the Cow) Here mama! you are the cow!
Mama: (taking the cow) Thanks Baby!
Sugar: You stand over there cow! (pointing)
Mama: Oh okay, I'll be over here sleeping.
Sugar: NOOOOOOOOOOOO! you aren't sleeping cow. You stand there and the goat will come say, "hi!"
Mama: Oh okay! "hi goat"
Sugar: moooooooooooooooooom! (sounds like MAAWWWWWWWW ummmmmm) The goat says, "hi!" The cow just stands there!
Mama: gotcha! (thumbs up)
Sugar: (doing her best goat impression) "hi cow! I'm going to the store!"
Mama: (doing my best cow impression) "ooooo that sounds fun, can I..."
Sugar: (interrupting mama) mooooooooooooomm! NO! the cow stays here!
Mama: OH okay! Sorry!
Sugar: "I'm going to the store cow! You stay here!" (starts to take her goat to another part of the room. Looks back and waits for mama to speak for the cow.
Mama: (a little hesitant) "ummmm okay...I'll stay here!"
Sugar: (annoyed) Mooooooooooooooooooooom! The cow needs to cry!
Mama: (a tad defensive) OH...how was I suppose to know?
Sugar: Just cry, okay?
Mama: Fine (best cow crying impression) "moo....hoo....moo hoo!"
Sugar: (smiles and brings goat back towards the cow) "awwwwww...don't cry cow!"
Mama: "sniff...sniff....mookay! I feel all better now! Thanks Goat"
Sugar: Moooooooooooooooooommm! NOOOOOOOO The cow is still crying! He needs to run over the barn and cry louder!
Mama: (a little annoyed) I don't want the cow to cry! Why is the cow crying? Can't the cow just go to the store with the goat?
Sugar: (rolling eyes at "Mama Doesn't Have a Clue") JUST CRY MOM! CRYYYYY!
Mama: (saluting "Miss Mind Reader") Yes ma'am! "mooooo hooo!"
Sugar: (smiles big!)
Mama: (bows to "Miss Mind Reader's" ultimate power)

So "Mama Doesn't Have a clue" sits there and wonders...how did Sugar Bear know that the cow needed to cry? Why can't Mama decide what the cow wants to do? I mean...as far as she knows...it is just a plastic cow, but according to "Miss Mind Reader" there is a plan. The cow must cry. There is no other choice. It is like this all the time now. She knows what the cars want to do or say. She knows when her dolls are hungry or tired, and exactly what must be done or said to make them feel better. MAMA DOES NOT KNOW. If mama tries to know...she is quickly informed that she is sadly mistaken. Only "Miss Mind Reader" knows how the play will go....and to be honest, Mama isn't loving it. She hopes this darling phase of Super Powerness ends quickly, and they can go back to the days of improv. Mama Doesn't Have a Clue's creativity is being squashed, and that right there is unexceptable. UNEXCEPTABLE!

9 Live It or Love It:

Anonymous said...

This is hilarious. Thank you so much for the laugh this morning. Oh I feel your pain. My princess is the same as your sugar bear. Some days I just can't do much right. You are not alone :)

LOL.

Deb said...

Oh too funny. Hannah used to give me a toy to play with and then after a few minutes she'd take it back and play all the parts herself while I just sat and watched, so she could have them all doing what they were 'supposed' to do. I'm not looking forward to when Becca hits this stage either. Good luck on the mind reading! :)

Autumn said...

Oh I can relate. If it is a phase, it's a VERY LONG phase in our household. Gavin is so very, very bossy.
Good post, I needed a laugh this morning. :)

Anonymous said...

HAHAHAHAHA!!! I haven't quite gotten to that stage with my youngest, but I've certainly gone through it with my son (trains) and my oldest daughter (Barbies). And like autumn said, "it's a VERY LONG phase."

Maybe I should hide the Little People stuff ;-)

Maude Lynn said...

Oh, yes, this phase is VERY long!

Jo Beaufoix said...

ooo Miss M does this too.
How do they get to know all this stuff?

Miss E also still does it, so Mama Zen is right. It's a looooooong phase.
Very Funny though. :D

Corey~living and loving said...

Oh man! I was scared you all would say that. ugh....this stage is a long one huh? I am not loving it. I am trying to fight it...but it isn't working. She is getting bossier by the day. Supposing I just need to let my creativity go...and become a over directed minion. sigh...

Jo Beaufoix said...

You'll be fine hon.
And she has to learn to share ideas as well as toys, so it will come.

Anonymous said...

Sorry to say but mine is age five and is still going strong with this 'phase' :P HILARIOUS post! I'm still laughing - you just made my day! : )

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