Saturday, January 31, 2009

25 Completely OBNOXIOUS Things YOU Never Wanted to Know about Me.

So....Sugar has been a bit sick, so I've not been blogging like I usually do, but I did take a tad too much time Thursday night coming up with 25 random things about me on FaceBook. Since I am up to the tippy top of my heart with snuggling a sick Sugar, I decided to be really lazy, and just post it here as well.

Now don't click away just yet....it really isn't your REGULAR type of list.

1. In my entire life, I have NEVER won a speling bee.

2. In first grade, in an effort to curb my talkative nature, they sat me next to the deaf child. If you could see me RIGHT NOW, I'm saying "I have to go potty" in sign language.

3. There is a dead bear that appears to be coming out of my living room wall. I thought since I didn't do the shooting, it wouldn't have hard feelings, but it ripped a big chunk of hair out of my head once. I'm about 99.8% I did nothing to deserve it.

4. I used to sing soprano in the school choir, but 6 years of cheerleading brought me down to an alto....I think it was the tight briefs I had to wear.

5. When I was 7, I had a worm farm....and one day my brother and his friend went fishing with my little friends. :( I probably only mentioned this so you'd feel sorry for me. I'm pretty sure I'm over it by now....well...mostly.

6. I may, or may not, have a toenail fungus on my pinky toe. I'm not saying....and you're not here to look, so we'll all just have to lose sleep wondering about it. I did read the other day that while Vick's Vapor rub might be harmful to young children, if might cure toe fungus. I may, or may not, have been interested in that little piece of information.

7. I really like to use commas, and sometimes, or most of the time, I use them without knowing for sure if they are needed, or not, but I can't seem to stop myself, or at least, I don't really want to.

8. I once spent like 10 minutes photographing a really cute mouse in my yard, then proceeded to run and scream like a girl when it decided to come towards me.

9. This one time, I was naked, and sitting on an exercise ball, in the shower, and my friend Kim was in there spraying my back with hot water, and ball was covering the drain, and we flooded the entire bathroom, and out into the NEXT room, and my friend Thom came, and heard us giggling, and left a present on the chair and slowly backed out of the room. It was either my 21st birthday party, or when I was in labor...you decide.

10. There was a time in my life, when I MAY have been a boobie pusher, and if my daughter ends up being lesbian, I'll forever wonder if the endless days of nursing while laying on the couch watching "Ellen" had anything to do with it. For the record....I'll love her just the same.....oh and you know....I'll love my daughter too. Let's Dance!

11. When I was in 6th grade, I got a huge sliver in my bum, but didn't want to admit I was dumb enough to slide across a wooden picnic bench with short shorts on, so I let it fester until it just came out on it's own. I wonder if I have a scar?

12. I once told my husband that cats were MORE affectionate than dogs. I think I mistook all the feline butt-licking for foreplay. (okay...so that is just wrong....who is writing this stuff?)

13. Talking about kittens, and angels, and fat little baby cheeks might help you forget about number 12. It isn't likely, but don't say I didn't try.

14. I once spent 2 hours re-routing a creek with my aunt, and had nothing to show for it but broken fingernails, and extremely exfoliated feet.

15. I probably didn't eat an entire bag of circus animal cookies in a period of two days. yeah...I probably didn't do that.

16. In the 8th grade, I had a pet spider in my pencil box for a month. Did you know that spiders need food, and pencil shavings AREN'T appealing? Me neither!

17. I am the most forgetful person on the planet. If I need to remember to do something, I call my house and leave myself a message. I'm telling you...this really works. EVERY.SINGLE.TIME, I come home and I'm all, "ooooo someone left me a message!" and then get disappointed when I realize it was only me. The disappointment doesn't last long, because I always make sure to say, "duh, Corey...you may be forgetful....but you are darn cute!" when I'm leaving the message. It really softens the blow.

18. Do you ever wonder why your thighs look like they were caught in a horrible hail storm? Yeah, me neither.

19. This one time at band camp.........okay so I never went to band camp, but I did play the alto saxophone in school for five years. If I picked up one today....I'd hardly know which end was what.

20. My husband once told me my boobs were racing for my knees. After the initial shock of it all, I had to admit that the right one is winning, and the left one is jealous.

21. I secretly think that I can easily keep a secret secret...but unless it's anti-perspirant,I might be wrong. My friends don't know this.........DAMN!

22.My dog predicted my going into labor by growling and staring at my crotch....that had never happened before....at least not that I ever wanted to admit.

23. My husband has delightfully brought home the following animals without discussing it with me first: an iguana, a chicken, two giniea pigs, one rabbit, a three legged turtle, one horny toad, two more rabbits, two more iguanas, and a miniature horse. Okay... so I'm exaggerating. One of those he didn't bring home....lucky me.b

24. I was once voted most likely to come up with 25 completely idiotic things to say about myself. They gave me a golden toilet plunger. My parents were so proud.

25. I only participated in this silly "25 things about me" thing because my friend Caitlin was whining about it. Whining pushes my buttons, so she worked me GOOD!

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND!

20 Live It or Love It:

ispeakbeanish said...

I have to curb myself with commas too.

Keep me posted on the Vicks....not that I have any reason to need a toenail fungus remedy....just for curiosity's sake...yeah...that's totally why.

ispeakbeanish said...

PS. Hope Sugar feels better soon. We're almost there at our house. T seems to be on the tail end of it, and The Bean and I just have a little cough left. It's been a LONG 3 weeks.

PPS. Facebook it TOTALLY addictive.

Aspiemom said...

Yes, Vicks does help with toenail fungus! I've had 3 nails removed and still have the stuff growin in my nail bed. I put Vick on them & a bandaid...my dr. had told me this.

Marcelle said...

LOL, I have had such a good laugh at your 25 topics...
What a brilliant fun entry...good for a Saturday evening in miserable Germany!!!!

Hope Sugar Bear recovers quickly...

david mcmahon said...

I want to know more about the flooded room ...

.... and the mouse!!

Hope Sugar is better.

Janet said...

HaHa! Hail damage! Not me (I wish) .... good blog! Hope Sugar gets back to her normal self soon!

JC said...

Lol... most of those were way too funny... and a few were just a tad more than :-D

Feel good wishes for Sugar Bear!

SECRET AGENT MAMA said...

Best post ever, yo! T O T A L L Y I N L O V E W I T H Y O U N O W!

Molly said...

I just had to comment as I have been "tagged" by so many people on FB to do the 25 Things ...and I still haven't done it. BUT your entry by far is the best one that I have read! It was classic. Thanks for the smirks and smiles that I had while reading it.

Megan (FriedOkra) said...

Oh, I want to hear more about that labor story, please! Sounds like a real humdinger!

Christina said...

I could never find you obnoxious. You're too funny and cute. 17- my mom has always done the same thing, and lately I've found myself doing it too. LOL

Now I have a reuest for your next post: Sugar's birth story. Or, ummm, maybe I should be asking to hear about your 21st birthday instead??

Tabitha Blue said...

HILARIOUS!!!!

Going from soprano to alto, nice :) Haha.

And the whole shower scene... I'm just going to go ahead and believe it was labor.. hopefully.

:)
~Tabitha~

freshmommyblog.com

Tabitha Blue said...

Oh and I use comments and periods.... ALOT!!

Oh yeah and exclamation point too!!!!!!!


:)
~Tabitha~

freshmommyblog.com

Jen - Queen of Poo said...

LOVED the exercise ball story! Why didn't I think of that when I was in labor?

I almost one a spelling bee, but choked at the last minute. What? One is spelled write!

I was also always in trouble for talking too much. My first grade teacher hated me.

Gayle said...

Ha! (That was a belly-laughing HA to be heard across the country). You are good for me! :)

Childlife said...

What was it you were saying not to long ago about being concerned that your blog had become boring? Ummmm... problem SOLVED! :D

You're a nut! I love that you leave yourself phone messages, forget about them and that you knew in advance that you would -- LOL!

P.S. I don't have a comma issue... I -- well... I sorta -- have a dot-tot-dot and dash issue -- ... Helllllp -- I can't stop... ;)

CMB said...

That was hysterical!

tommie said...

I kept thinking, "this one time, at bandcamp...." through most of this. I seriously laughed out loud.

Michelle said...

oh my gosh your list cracked me up and I totally needed a laugh today - thanks!

holly said...

oh my bob, i totally forgot about the number 12 whilst talking about kittens and angels and fat little baby cheeks. that was AMAZING. i'm going to do it again.

i love that your boobs are jealous of each other.

i think the least you could do was give a pic of that plunger.


THIS was a fanTASTic 25 things post. i love it unreservedly, whole-heartedly.

i heart you.

i almost heart you enough to be your lesbian lover.

but i'm married. dang. he *does* have man flu, though, so his days might be numbered. i'll take the ring off just in case, okay?

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