The hubby (repost)

*******REPOST ALERT! YES, AGAIN! Hey...I'm in Disneyland...you can't expect me to be blogging, now can you? Just imagine me skipping along holding hands with Mickey right about now!

This REPOST is for Kimberly, and Jen, in particular, but many of you folks newer to my blog might find it interesting as well. Back in Januaryu of this year, I asked my readers for a little inspiration, and I've been trying to answer some of thier questions. Today's repost is an effort to point folks in the right direction for answers about The Hubby. True...I wrote it in 2009, but everything is still correct, and not a lot has changed. If after reading all this, you have more specific questions....just leave them in comments. I'm a pretty open person, as you'll see, and you can ask, and I may or may not answer, but I'll certainly not judge you for asking. We are curious folks...I get that. ENJOY! *****

Yeah, back in January, I posted my 500th post, and asked my readers to inundate me with questions. A few of you, took me up on that, and have been so patient in waiting for the answers (As long as you don't count that one death threat, and the burning pile of dog poo I found in the porch the other day.) I did managed to cover some of the random questions HERE, a version of my perfect day HERE, and got a bit wordy HERE about the photography queries.

So BACK OFF!

As much as I'd like to continue to procrastinate doing the tougher questions, I simply can not deny that I actually have the time today to tackle all the questions about The Hubby today. It is Spring Break, The Sugar is at preschool today, The Hubby is working, and it isn't late at night, and my brain is actually functioning. Sounds like a perfect combination to knock this puppy out. So here goes.....

In an effort to not have to rehash the whole story, if you haven't been along for this whole "Living and Loving" ride, please head over here and read a bit about the foundation. Due to his desire for privacy, I rarely write about him. I did, however, give in and open a bit up about him here. Please check those two posts out before moving on. I'll wait. In fact, I'll take this time to go eat a cinnamon roll. It is lonely, and has been calling me name. I'm just gonna eat it to shut it up. K?

Okay...so I take it we're all back, and completely up on the saga of my life. I'll wipe the frosting off my fingers, and get to it.

I know, I briefly mentioned that The Hubby and I have been together since the beginning of time High School, but Aspiemom wondered where I met him. I wish I remember the very first time we saw each other, but I hardly remember what I had for lunch yesterday, so it is a little much to expect from my feeble mind. I do know, that I am a third generation graduate of my High School, and I started attending that School District my 2nd grade year. The Hubby, however, moved to my hometown sometime during his Junior Year, which was my Freshman Year. While I don't recall the exact day I met him, I do have some early memories of him. He remembers seeing me on the school bus, and I remember drooling over his lifted, red and white 1979 Ford pick-up. It really stood out in our small town. No one else had anything like it. Remember, that he already worked for his dad in Commercial Fishing, so he had more money than the rest of us lazy teenagers.

The Hubby and my brother were in the same class, and became friends. It wasn't until the following year, that we started spending time together. Soon we were dating. It was my first real relationship. In fact, by the fall of my Junior Year, I was completely and utterly FREAKED out to be so serious. Doing what any crazy teenage girl would do. I broke up with him. It was awful, and broke both our hearts. For nearly a year, we remained apart, and unhappy. The Summer of my Senior Year, we got back together....and the rest....is history. We dated for 5 years, then got married, after I finished College. We will celebrate our 13th wedding anniversary this July. Man.....time flies.

That brings us to present day. Jo Beaufoix asked me if The Hubby ever poses for photos for me. The answer is a pretty big NO. As you read in that second post I linked to about hubby (what you didn't read it????? SHAME ON YOU!), the only time he easily allows me to take photos is when he with with a dead animal. I'm sorry to say, I can't stomach it, and do not try to take a nice portrait. I just simply point and shoot. All the other photos I have of him, are ones I snuck when he wasn't paying attention. The other day, I realized that there is not a single photo of us together since 1996. I was shocked...but not surprised. Upon further contemplation I remembered that there are a few of us together at my brother's wedding, in 2004. It is a bit sad, and something I need to remedy. I mentioned it to him, and he may allow some shots of us one of these days. He is just so self-conscience, and doesn't value the documentation of his life. However, for my dear Sugar Bear, I must find a way to get her parents in the same photo. It is my newest mission.

Both Autumn and Gayle wanted to hear a bit more about The Hubby and Sugar Bear's relationship, and how I feel about it. You see, I have 100% responsibility of Sugar Bear, and while it is strange to MANY, it works for us. In fact, I works really well for me. I'm a bit of a control freak......yup.....I am, and particularly about parenting decisions. I rather like that I have 100% say on how Sugar Bear is raised, and I like to think it makes it easier on Sugar Bear, as she has very consistent parenting. So many parents struggle to agree on some many parenting decisions, and I am POSITIVE that The Hubby and I would be arguing A LOT about all the details, because we are very different people. Instead, all things are diverted to me, and since my connection with Sugar is so deep, I don't mind one bit. From day one it has been all me. The best way to describe it is to think of a single parent. That is me. If it has to do with the care of Sugar, it is my job. Specifically, Autumn wondered if The Hubby had ever watch Sugar Bear alone. A combination of respecting their comfort levels, and my annoying control issues, it happens very rarely. Usually for no more than 45 minutes. I will run to the store, or something if she is sleeping. If she wakes up, they do fine while I'm gone, but neither feel real comfortable. As she gets older this happens more often, and it is easier on them. I think the first time, they were alone together Sugar was 2 1/2.

The Hubby and Sugar have a relationship that is unique to them. It is much like a Big Brother/Little Sister relationship. They play together sometimes, bicker at times, and while they love each other, they also annoy each other. The Hubby likes to share the things that interest him with Sugar. They tend to Tiny, the pony, together, he shows her all sorts of wildlife, and the things he builds. She finds him fascinating, and has learned a lot about the world from him. Again, as she ages, it becomes easier for them to find things to do together, as she shows more interest in what he is doing. We do family things together, as you can see if you peruse my blog a bit. We go to the beach, for drives in the woods, and so on. I am rarely alone, as Gayle wondered. In fact, I yearn for alone time. So many years of The Hubby being away fishing set me up for cherishing my alone time, now that it isn't as easy to come by.

I'm well aware of how strange it all sounds, but while it isn't the traditional family, it is working for us. I am grateful to have Sugar Bear in my life, and there honestly hasn't been a single day since her birth that I wished for help in her care from The Hubby. I firmly believe that if your accept things as they are, it is easier to manage it all. I never wish it was "his turn" to put Sugar to bed. I wouldn't miss it for the world. I don't spend time wishing things were different, because they simply are what they are, and I'm okay with that. I consider myself VERY lucky. Sugar Bear is the most amazing thing to ever happen to me.

The photos in this post were taken back in July when The Hubby, Sugar Bear and I went camping. The Hubby was helping our dog, Daisy, practice diving, and wanted Sugar to see better. The water in the creek was not only over Sugar's head, it was extremely cold. The best way for Sugar to see the action was on his shoulder's. I was so glad to have my zoom lens on my camera, as I was able to snap these shots. I added texture to them, as they weren't the best quality. I'm pleased with the results, and know that Sugar will cherish these photos when she is older.

Are You Listening (REPOST)

******This is a repost from 2008. I wanted to "play it again" as I have been seeing a lot of "parental beating up of ones self" out in bloggy land lately. Here is a reminder of how to be the best parent you can be.....the best YOU that you can be. Enjoy!******

“The world is a playground, and life is pushing my swing.” ~Natalie Kocsis





When you are at the playground with your children.....what are you doing? Are you there....but not there? Are you thinking of the 401 other things that need to be done this week? Are you talking with other moms or dads? Connecting with someone over the age of 5? or are you playing? Climbing, sliding, running and swinging? In my opinion....you should be.......doing........any, or all of the above. Are you surprised I said that?





It is my belief that only you know best what YOU need on any given day. Your needs and wants change depending on your mood, and what all you are dealing with each day. It is important to listen to your body, and HONOR what it is telling you. Through this communication with yourself, you are better able to be the person you want to be, and most importantly....the PARENT you want to be. We must never lose sight of the fact that we are humans who have feelings, emotions, needs, and wants, and they need not be sacrificed to our children. In fact, I do not believe for one second that a person can actually give up themselves completely and still be a worthy partner or parent. It is a recipe for disaster.





Today, I'd like to encourage you to slow down and listen....listen to what your body is telling you. Are you ready for some fun? If so, then go for it. Play.....run, jump, and swing. Be silly, let loose....forget what others think. Your children will love it. They will feed upon your carefree spirit, and give of themselves as well. You might be surprised at how the energy builds, and you might walk away with a replenished soul.





Listen to your body.....are you stressed, and really need some time to organize your life in your mind? Give yourself permission to take advantage of the time at the playground to encourage your children's ability to entertain themselves, while you sit back and calculate what needs to be done first....and what can wait. Certainly some folks benefit from time to just plan. The park can easily be a place to get our kids out of your hair long enough for you to THINK. By the time you leave, you just might have a handle on what to tackle next.





Listen to your body....are you craving adult interaction? If you have one more conversation about Potty Time Elmo, you might make good on your little fantasy to wire Dora's loud little mouth shut? If this is case, please find an adult and commence talking. There is absolutely no shame in a "mommy play date!" While the kids are wearing themselves out, reconnect with the outside world. In the end, you'll be better prepared for the after dinner discussion of why they won't be allowed to wear their bathing suit and rubber boots to preschool tomorrow.




Listen to your body....are you just needing some time to mentally "checkout"? Are your kids old enough to handle themselves at the playground while you quietly flip through a magazine on a nearby bench? Just a half hour of "me time" can do wonders. As you leave the park, you might find a more relaxed state of mind. When we are relaxed, we are much more likely to be understanding, and patient with our kids. Everyone benefits from an emotionally healthy mom and dad.





I have no doubt that every person reading this post has their children's best interests at heart. A recent post of mine was mostly well received. I have to admit that I had my doubts when I published it. I worried over how folks would take it. I wanted very much to simply convey the idea that parenting by chance might not be the route best suited to meet the needs of our children. I wanted to encourage others to simply look at who they are, and who they want to be as a parent, and strive to achieve it. Through reading the comments, and a few other blog posts inspired by mine, it became quite obvious that:

a. We all love our kids more than we ever imagined possible.

b. Parenting is the hardest job on earth.

c. Often we aren't parenting the way we would like to.

d. We can be pretty hard on ourselves.

It is my hope that in the next few weeks, I can address some of my thoughts on these observations. I'd do it now, but as well all know, my posts tend to be on the extremely LONG side, and I am fairly certain this post has reached it's entertainabilty (yes, I made that word up) limit as it stands. So stay tuned! In the mean time, concentrate on listening to your body, and honoring what it is telling you. In the end,that is the best way to ensure your child's happiness.

*****If you found this post interesting or helpful you might like to check out all my Parenting posts HERE. *******

My 100th post (Revisited)

***This is a repost of my 100th post. Originally posed in September of 2007. I now have over 1010 posts. You think I should make a list of 1000 things to know about Corey? ummmmm yeah....I'm not sure I'm that complex. :) For those of you who weren't here back in the day...this there might be things listed here you didn't know. For those of you who were here....you might have forgotten most of these because you are old, and forgetful like me. :) ENJOY!***

I am thrilled to announce my 100th post. Honestly, I am a little surprised to have reached this milestone in a reasonable amount of time. I usually either drag my feet at things....or get so obsessed that I do nothing else. I think that 5 months is a perfect amount of time to have made these posts.
I want to thank everyone that has supported me in this venture. It has been wonderful. I have made new friends. I have made better friends out of old friends I already had, and I have made some friends worry more than a little bit about my mental health. Heck...I say you haven't done a good job unless someone thinks you are crazy, right?

Life is good!
So, in the tradition of many bloggers ahead of me, I will proceed to bore the heck out of delight you, and list 100 facts about me.

1. I am a talker.

2. In first grade they threatened to make me sit out during folk dancing class if I didn’t be quiet.

3. To this day, I still can’t dance.

4. When that didn’t work, they sat me by the deaf child named David.

5. I love sign language.

6. My college roommate freshman year was hearing impaired.

7. I loved college.

8. I love learning new things.

9. I actually enjoy taking classes.

10. I don’t really like tests so much, but if I had to choose, I’d pick a multiple choice test. I am good at recognizing the right answer. Not so good at remembering the right answer in my head.

11. Since having my daughter, I have a horrible memory.

12. I often call home and leave myself a message to remind myself to do something that evening.

13. I am always surprised to have a message when I get home, and feel like a dork when I hear my own voice.

14. However, I don’t feel like a dork for long, because I often preface my message with, “Hey Corey! You sexy mama you!”

15. I take my compliments where I can get them.

16. I am extremely proud of my daughter Sugar Bear.

17. Because of Number 1, I often bore people with my stories of her.

18. I think she is the most perfect person on this planet. How did I ever get so blessed?

19. I am a positive person. I like to make lemonade out of the lemons that roll my way.

20. I only drink water and skim milk.

21. Occasionally, I drink lemonade or another juice.

22. I had surgery for Acid Reflux.

23. They took my gall bladder out at the same time.

24. I offered to let them take the appendix too while they were in there, but they opted out.

25. I have been in the hospital 3 times in my life.

26. The first time was when I was born.

27. The other time was my natural childbirth with my daughter.

28. I think the least painful of all three was when I was born……yes…that is correct.

29. I am not fond of pain.

30. I have no tattoos, nor a desire to get one.

31. I only have my ears pierced with one hole in each ear.

32. I have lots of lovely jewelry from my darling husband, but I tend to put on a necklace and earrings and wear them for a month, then change.

33. I am not a girly girl.

34. I don’t wear much make-up. Only lip gloss and sometimes blush.

35. I have had the same hair style since 1990. It is low maintenance.

36. I am a shower at night sort of person.

37. My alarm goes off at 7am, and we are out of the house by 7:30.

38. I think it is evil that I have to wake a sleeping child every morning to go to daycare.

39. I feel it is just as evil that said child then wakes up early on the weekends, so I can’t sleep.

40. I used to be a sleeper. 10 hours sleep was a must.

41. I am lucky to get 7-8 these days.

42. I used to take naps whenever I felt like it.

43. Now I blog when my daughter is napping.

44. I used to have so many TV shows I just HAD to see, but these days it is down to a few.

45. I used to lay in bed and read books all day. This was before Sugar Bear. I don’t really miss those days, but I think my reading skills have suffered.

46. My handwriting has never been pretty, but these days it is a down right embarrassment.

47. I am trying to write my cousin who just started college a handwritten letter at least 2 times a week.

48. I have been horribly busy lately and haven’t succeeded in that effort. I need to write her a letter tonight.

49. I love my job. It is a VERY family friendly environment.

50. I was blessed with being able to bring my daughter to work with me for her first year.

51. I am not certain I got a lot of work done.

52. This is the longest I have ever had a job, by FAR!

53. This is my 10th year in this job.

54. I do feel quite a bit of burnout at times, but I have a mission this year, to find the joy in it again.

55. Holidays bring me joy.

56. Christmas is my favorite holiday.

57. I love giving presents.

58. I am thrifty shopper, so I already have many Christmas gifts purchased.

59. I am not really loving having my daughter’s birthday the same time of year as Christmas. I think it is better to have the fun spread out around the year more.

60. I think when she gets older, I MAY start really celebrating on her Half birthday.

61. This year, we are going with the Less is More attitude. She has too much stuff as it is.

62. I fight clutter in all areas of my life. It is definitely an area I need improvement.

63. I also don’t really like to cook that much, so we are often eating the same things over and over again.

64. However, I have over 30 cookbooks.

65. I like to look at food.

66. I like to eat food.

67. My husband is a good cook.

68. He isn’t a “lite” cook, however. The more fat the better.

69. I shouldn’t eat his meals as often as I do.

70. When no one is home, I tend to eat cold cereal for dinner.

71. I think Cinnamon Toast Crunch is YUMMY!

72. My daughter won’t eat cold cereal, and I find it hard to relate to.

73. I like to believe I am generally an empathic person.

74. I truly try to put myself in another person's shoes.

75. I tend to over analyze things.

76. Are you looking at me funny?

77. I love to make people laugh.

78. I love to laugh.

79. I love my daughter’s laugh.

80. I love to photograph her laughing, and she has the best smile EVER!

81. I just love to photograph in general, and have learned so much in the last 3 years about photography.

82. I take too many pictures.

83. I used to scrapbook, but the shear amount of pictures I have of my daughter overwhelms me.

84. I like being creative.

85. I enjoy making things for people.

86. I often take on too much.

87. I am a stress eater.

88. Right now I am eating a starburst I don’t need!

89. I am ten pounds overweight.

90. I don’t understand why fat rolls on babies are so cute, and on adults it is really not cute at all.

91. I will be 33 this month.

92. Sometimes I am in denial that I am already in my thirties. I just don’t feel like I could be that old.

93. Sometimes I worry that life is just going by too quickly.

94. I try to cherish each and everyday, and concentrate on just how very blessed I am.

95. I believe that life is what you make it.

96. I believe in accepting those you love for who they are, and supporting them in being the best they can be.

97. I believe in gentle discipline, co-sleeping, baby wearing, and extended breastfeeding.

98. I am entering my 33rd month of breastfeeding. (interesting...I'm turning 33 in our 33rd month of breastfeeding.)

99. I am totally okay if number 98 bothers you.

100. My most honored position in life is that of a mother.

So there you have it. Corey in a nutshell, and it is totally okay if you think I am nuts. If so, I'd prefer to be referred to as an almond, as it is the best nut of all.

Twas the Night Before Christmas......again

THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS

by Clement Clarke Moore

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house

Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,

While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads;

And mamma in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap,

Had just settled down for a long winter's nap,

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash,

Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow

Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below,

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,

But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer,

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.

More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen!

On, Comet! on Cupid! on, Donder and Blitzen!

To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!

Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,

When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,

So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,

With the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof

The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.

As I drew in my hand, and was turning around,

Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound.

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,

And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;

A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,

And he looked like a peddler just opening his pack.

His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow;

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,

And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath;

He had a broad face and a little round belly,

That shook, when he laughed like a bowlful of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,

And filled all the stockings; then turned with a jerk,

And laying his finger aside of his nose,

And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose;

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.

But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,

"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night."

This is a repost for the THIRD time. I simply can't let a holiday go by without sharing these photos from our 2006 Christmas card photoshoot. Isn't my Sugar the cutest little Mouse you have ever seen?????

I is for Innocence (A Repost)

Last night, as I looked at the picture I posted for i ♥ faces, I couldn't help but want to share the rest of that series. I hunted around and found my original post that showcased this sweet set, and two things struck me. I miss having time to blog in such a thoughtful fashion, and golly gee whiz, my girl might look different on the outside these days, but she is still the same person I described with she was 2 and a half. Gosh I'm BLESSED!

Here is the original post....Enjoy!

Innocence....as in "purity of heart"! My Sugar Bear is the picture of Innocence.
William Butler Yeats once said, “The innocent and the beautiful have no enemy but time”. I think of this, and it makes me sad. Why must the innocent child proceed through time, and lose that most precious gift? Why must that pure heart learn of sadness, anger, heartbreak, evil, destruction, and death?



Do you remember when blowing the seeds from a dandelion meant making wishes, magic, fairies, and fun? When did I grow up and realize that blowing dandelions just spreads weeds? When did I lose the magic? When did I stop believing. Oh how I wish....wish I could shield my Sugar from all things ugly in this world. I wish I could preserve her innocence forever.



"First I make a wish, then I blow real hard,
And the little dandelions blow all over the yard,
And I wait and I hope for my wish to come true.
Guess there's only so much a dandelion can do."
~A verse from Dandelion Song
(Linda Allen, Kristin and Jennifer Allen-Zito)



When I look into her eyes I see only the beautiful things in life. I don't see the lines of pain and sorrow. I don't see the knowledge of hurt and heartache. I see unconditional love and trust. I see belief....wonder....magic....and hope. She just closes her eyes and makes a wish.



She tackles each day with INTEREST. She doesn't hold back for fear of failure. She tries new things. She asks questions, and soaks up the answers as if she were a daisy reaching for the sun.



She looks on the world with INTRIGUE. She notices things I have long ago forgotten. She finds all things worthy of INSPECTION, and often deems them amazing. To her, even a bug deserves a second glance, a question, a moment of her life.



She lets her IMAGINATION run wild, and doesn't fear looking silly or IGNORANT. She has no hang ups about how she looks, or what she knows. She just does what seems right to her at the time, only sometimes looking back for that smile of encouragement from her mama.



She giggles, and snickers....


and the joy of life simply radiates from her soul. It blesses my heart to have captured this feeling in a photo. This single photo is the picture of INNOCENCE, of purity of heart. This small child knows what is right with this world. I find her to be so very INSPIRATIONAL. She makes me want to be a better person.


Indeed, I need to be a better person, as I have no doubt this INNOCENT child learned the following attitude from ME. There is no way, a child who finds great joy in the simple things could possible be this BORED with a daisy! Okay, so maybe it was the fourth time she asked to get off the rock and go play, and I begged, "please baby....just a few more pictures!"

Yup...that might have done it. THAT might have stole the joy right out of a perfect day of exploring. A perfect day of interest, intrigue, inspection, imagination,and innocence. Sorry Sugar Bear, Mama is several steps behind you...but she is learning...she is trying.

(These photos were taken this past July....if you are interested in seeing the others I took that day, please visit this post titled, "A Creek, some Cows....and a Sugar Bear!")

Twas the Night Before Christmas......

THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS

by Clement Clarke Moore

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house

Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,

While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads;

And mamma in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap,

Had just settled down for a long winter's nap,

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash,

Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow

Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below,

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,

But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer,

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.

More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen!

On, Comet! on Cupid! on, Donder and Blitzen!

To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!

Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,

When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,

So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,

With the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof

The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.

As I drew in my hand, and was turning around,

Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound.

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,

And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;

A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,

And he looked like a peddler just opening his pack.

His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow;

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,

And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath;

He had a broad face and a little round belly,

That shook, when he laughed like a bowlful of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,

And filled all the stockings; then turned with a jerk,

And laying his finger aside of his nose,

And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose;

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.

But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,

"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night."

This is a repost for the second time. I simply can't let a holiday go by without sharing these photos from our 2006 Christmas card photoshoot. Isn't my Sugar the cutest little Mouse you have ever seen?????

A Drop in the Ocean (RE-POST)

Continuing on with my blogaversary re-post week, I'd like to thank everyone for stopping by and entering my GIVEAWAY. You still have until 5pm (PST) May 1st. So PLEASE head over to that post and enter.

Today's re-post is simply indulgent. I just can't help but love this post. It is a really good window into th mind of Corey. AND....I still adore these photos. oh how I loved that hat....and chubby cheeks! ♥ ENJOY!

Mother Theresa of Calcutta once said:

“We ourselves feel that what we are doing is just a drop in the ocean. But the ocean would be less because of that missing drop.”

Often I find myself going about my daily life wondering what I am actually accomplishing. Before Sugar Bear entered my life, I distinctly remember feeling as if I were making no difference in this world at all. I hated feeling like it really didn't matter what I did, in 70 years...there would be no one here to remember me, and what I accomplished. I felt as if there was no purpose. Sugar Bear changed all that. There is absolutely NO doubt in my mind that I was destined to be her mother. My purpose in life is to raise this girl up, and in doing so....I am making a difference.

At the end of each day, I find myself wondering about that "drop in the ocean". I sit back and think about the events of the day, and ponder which of the activities we did, made a difference. Sometimes it is harder than others to come to the realization that EVERYTHING I do makes a difference to Sugar Bear. EVERYTHING!!!

The simple things.....the fun things.....the hard things...the sad things....the loving things....the loud things....the quiet things....and the mad things. All those things put together are making a difference. All those things will come together, and as Sugar grows...they will make up who she is. Every moment of everyday is a lesson. Whether I try or not....I am making a difference.

Even a simple trip to the beach yields so many important lessons in life.

Sometimes life is seen as half full.


Sometimes it is half empty.


Sometimes we are blessed with MANY.


Sometimes ONE is plenty.


Sometimes we need to ask for help.


Sometimes we stand alone.


Sometimes we are the ones drawing the line.


Sometimes we are the ones to cross it.


Sometimes we need to follow...


and follow...


and follow.


Sometimes we just need to lead.

And no matter what....it is ALWAYS better if you have a silly hat, and a SMILE!




LIFE IS GOOD!

N...is for naughty or nice (re-post)

How is everyone doing? I'm sorry if this crazy week of re-posting is boring, but I'm making real headway on my scrapbooking, and that makes me happy.

As, I have said all week, be sure to head over to my Giveaway post. You don't want to miss it.

Today, I want to share one of my first indepth discussions of my parenting philosphy. I love writing pieces like this, but they take so much time, and I rarely find the right moment to write such pieces. I hope to remedy that this summer. You can read some of my other parenting posts HERE.

So if you missed it the first time....or just might enjoy a reminder food for thought, here it is:



You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance. ~Franklin P. Jones

Recently I have run across several discussions on Toddler Tantrums. Lis Garrett posted a lovely article on her blog, that really got me thinking about this subject. Then The Nap Warden reached out for advice. Reading comments on such posts intrigues me. I am forever amazed at the vast difference in parenting there is out there. The different techniques out there opens my eyes and gives me a chance to reflect on my own parenting style and try to articulate why I do the things I do.



One of my favorite questions for other parents is "WHY?" Yeah, I know....it isn't like they never hear that question from their children. However, I enjoy challenging people to articulate WHY they are parenting the way they are parenting. Often, I find, that parents stumble around at a loss for explaining their line of thinking. I am not saying that folks aren't thinking when they are parenting. I am saying that often we just don't know WHY we are doing things the way we are. Maybe it is just how they have seen it done....or how they were parented. Maybe they are just trying out things they have read about. Possibly they are just going with their gut. Any case.....it is always advisable to take a step back, and really think about WHY. In this....we must truly analyze who we are, and who we want to be.

I'd like to share one of the most inspirational quotes I have read in a long...long time.

We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today. ~Stacia Tauscher

WOW! Read it again.

We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget that he is someone today. ~Stacia Tauscher

Oh my yes.....that says so much. It touches my heart. I see the relevance of it in our world. As non-judgmental as I TRY to be, I often fall short when I see children being treated without empathy. Young children are just like you and me. Their body runs the full range of emotions. Each day they may feel happy one minute, and extremely discouraged the next. We are not born knowing how to express emotion. It is through interacting with adults that children learn how to identify emotion, and how to appropriately express those feelings.



As a parent, I find that when I consistently handle my daughter with the care all humans deserve, and empathize with her challenges, I come the closest to getting it right. I believe that most of our difficulties are based on the fact that she is a normal human being with the full gamut of emotion, and it is MY job to help her successfully deal with those emotions. It is MY job to take her by the hand and lead her in the right direction.



I parent by the golden rule. I treat Sugar as I would like to be treated. To achieve this, I have had to dig deep and identify my own feelings.

-I do NOT like to get in trouble for things I didn't even know was wrong. Children are not born knowing the rules. They must learn right from wrong from others. It is OUR job to successfully lead children in the right direction. I try to think of how I would feel if I entered a new job, and no one told me what I was supposed to do. I was just let loose on the job, and then suddenly without warning I was reprimanded for the things I did incorrectly. I try not to inflict such confusion on my child. I set clear boundaries, and steadily work at making sure she understands them. Most young children will not get it right away. It is through consistent follow thru on the parents part, that they begin to understand and follow the rules. It is my belief that the majority of the time, children WANT to do the right thing. They may have impulses and desires that are inappropriate, but that is due to their developmental age....NOT because they WANT to be bad.

-I do NOT like to be yelled at. In fact, when I am yelled at, I shut down. I can not listen, or learn in this situation. I have fear, and anger. It is especially hurtful when someone I love and trust yells at me. Knowing this about myself, I apply it to my dealings with Sugar. 99% of the time I refrain from raising my voice. If safety is involved, I may shout out to get attention, but other than that, I use a normal tone of voice. I like being able to get down at her level and say, "Oh my....You are yelling. Remember....we don't yell. Mama doesn't yell at you....and you don't yell at me. Can you tell Mama in your normal voice?"

-I do NOT like to be physically hurt. I know this is touching on a really touchy subject, but I am simply stating WHY I chose not to physically discipline MY child. I try to imagine what my world would be like if every time I made a mistake someone hit me. I don't care if they had warned me....or if it was unexpected, I would be so fearful. I am certain I would NOT work in a job where the boss had the right to hit me every time I messed up. We can all agree that it isn't a healthy relationship if my partner has the right to hit me if I forget to take the garbage out. I am fairly certain that respect isn't garnered by physical punishment. Fear should not be mistaken for respect. I respect hundreds of people who never laid a hand on me. Knowing this about myself, I practice a "hands off" parenting style, even when safety is involved. I am ever mindful of the message I am sending my child. I believe ALL humans have the right to be free of physical violence. (Please know, that I am respectful of other parenting choice, but it won't stop me from asking you WHY, and hoping that you can articulate your answer.)

-I do NOT like being completely without choice. Seriously....can you imagine having NO control of your life? I can not. I like having choices. I don't always have all the choices, but it is nice to have some. I parent keeping this in mind. I may not be able to let Sugar choose when bedtime is....but she certainly can decided which jammies she gets to wear. I make it a habit of offering her a choice as often as possible, so she has a greater sense of control. "Would you like to put your shoes or your coat on first before we go?" "Do you want the blue or the red cup?" "Do you want to brush your teeth or take a bath first?" "Which book would you like me to read?" The possibilities are endless. Then when something comes up, that just isn't a choice I say, "I can hear that you don't want to take a nap right now, but this is just not a choice. It is nap time. How about AFTER your nap, you can choose which game we are going to play?" I always try to offer a replacement choice.

-I do NOT like it when my feelings are disregarded. When I say, "I'm sad!", I certainly don't want to hear, "I don't care!" When I am frustrated, it doesn't help to be ignored. Often if someone can just empathize with me....it helps. Keeping this in mind, I ALWAYS acknowledge Sugar's feelings. It is perfectly okay for her to be angry, frustrated, sad, happy, or excited. She just may not be expressing it appropriately. I acknowledge her feelings, let her know if the way she is expressing it is okay or not, and offer an alternative if needed. "Oh dear, Sugar...I can see you are very disappointed. You don't want to leave the park. It is okay to be sad about it, but remember we don't yell at each other. Maybe when we get to the car, you can snuggle your blanket for a bit. That might make you feel better." or "Sugar....I see that you are very angry at mommy. I am sorry that you can not watch another episode of Dora right now, but you can not hit. Remember we have a rule about NO hurting. Can you use your words and tell mama how you are feeling?" I believe it is okay for her to say, "I am mad at YOU!" as long as she isn't yelling it at me. I then say, "Yes, I can see you are mad. Sometimes we just get mad at each other, but that is okay. We still love each other. Maybe we can come up with something that will make you feel better." I do NOT give in. She does not get to do whatever it was that started the anger, but I am not opposed to helping her feel better. Don't we like others to try to make us feel better when we are upset? You'd be surprised how quickly some children feel better about things when they are sure you understand them.

On a whole, I practice the whole "reward good behavior and prevent misbehavior" technique. Most parents understand and practice the first part of that statement, but the last half is often misunderstood. I like to believe that I parent using a good Offense. I do my very best to stay in tuned to my child, and predict her feelings and moods. As Lis stated, when Sugar is tired, or hungry she is more likely to have a meltdown. Knowing this, I go into it prepared to prevent the tantrum. Instead of saying, "it is time for bath" when I know she is likely to get upset, I say, "Sugar! When we jump in the bath right now,do you want to play Ice Cream Shop or bubble beards first?" She is tricked into focusing on the exciting things she will get to play, and totally forgets that she really didn't feel like taking a bath in the first place. This technique sets the child up for success....and isn't that what it is all about?



Children are born, and placed into our arms. It is our mission to embrace them, honor them, respect them, teach them, and love them. It isn't easy, but they are counting on us to do the right thing. You decided what is right for you, and yours.