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Sunday, May 8, 2011

Who She Is

Recently, I spent some time looking back in this ol' blog's archives, and couldn't help but notice how much I used to WRITE. Boy did I write. I'm so very glad I did. Reading the old posts is like a gift to myself. A gift that I could only imagine when I wrote them. They give me small glimpses into our past, and for a mama with a pretty forgetful memory, it is truly priceless.

One post, in particular "spoke to me" this week. I wrote that post almost FOUR years ago. Sugar Bear was only 2 and a half at the time, and if you think I'm smitten with my girl should have seen me than (and I know some of you did). I had a full-on CRUSH on my precious little honey, and I wasn't afraid to admit it. :)

In that post, I discussed my feelings about Sugar Bear growing up....and the change that might come to her personality and our relationship. It is hard things to think about, but I think I reflected my feelings pretty well. One thing I did that I am truly grateful for is the fact that I listed out a few personality traits that I felt accurately described my Sugar Bear at the time. Here is the list:

people shy

Scanning that list today, I see that some four years later, things have quite nearly stayed the same as much as they have changed. Sugar Bear is no longer:


But she is still is:

People Shy

She is also:

Mindful (Attentive; heedful)
Easy Going

As I sit here contemplating my dearest Sugar Bear, and trying to pinpoint traits that describe her, I get lost in the many facets of who she is. She really is quite nearly a completely different child in certain situations. I think her kindergarten teacher would be so surprised to hear me describing Sugar as funny, and adventuresome. In school she is shy and mindful. She hesitates, and goes with the flow, often letting others choose for her. With me, she is confident, and exuberant. She takes charge, yet she does often look to me for approval. People have said that she lives to please me. This messes with a mama's emotions. While it has aided in easily raising this girl up so far, it worries me. I want her to make her own decisions, and stand by HER thoughts and beliefs. She is just so compliant, and easy to be with. It is hard to encourage her to be different.

Writing this post has sparked an idea that I want to pursue. I will be asking several folks who are important in Sugar Bear's life to pick 5 words that describe her. It will be fun to see what they come up with, and to compare them to who I see her to be. I'll be sure to share the results when I get them.

In the mean time, I am committing to MORE writing. All too often, I only carve out enough time to throw some pictures up on the blog, and call it good. Reading my older posts really reminded me how important it is to document the who, the when, the where and the why of our everyday goings on. I don't ever want to forget WHO my girl was, is, and will be....


and how I feel about that. It's the feelings I don't want to forget.

4 Live It or Love It:

Lisa said...

Happy Mother's Day Corey,
Enjoy your family and enjoy your day.

Autumn said...

I love the idea of asking others in Sugars life describe her in five words. So often we think of our kids as being who they are when they are with us. Even though they are different with others, that is still who they are too.
Too often I have thought to myself "Oh but that's not who he really is" when someone describes Bug in a way that he doesn't normally act around me. But it is part of who he really is too.
I hope you had a wonderful mothers day. Mine was one of the very best I can remember. I'll have to post pictures soon. :)

Anonymous said...

Thanks for sharing your "love story" with the and SB have such a sweet thing going.

inkyblog said...

I love that girl - she is the sweetest, most loving, joyful little girl and my boys still talk about her and miss her :)

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